Eles chegaram num caminhão, desceram com a grande escada, a serra e todos os apetrechos necessários. Eram três homens. Tocaram meu interfone e pediram que eu retirasse o carro que estava estacionado em frente. Era para evitar acidente.
Ao me dirigir ao carro, dei com os três armados em frente à árvore.
Era uma árvore gigantesca, talvez, centenária. Informaram-me de que se tratava de uma Saboneteira, árvore cujas sementes são usadas para fazer sabão e contas de colares.
Questionei-lhes o porquê da derrubada. Disseram-me que o morador constatara, junto com um engenheiro, que o pé da árvore estava infestado de cupins, o que poderia causar um grave acidente.
De repente, ao contemplar a árvore, vejo uma casa de joão-de-barro construída entre dois troncos. Já estava pronta.
Imediatamente, peço a eles que não comecem a trabalhar a serra antes de retirar a casinha.
_ Deem-me a casinha inteira. Soa não como uma ordem, mas uma súplica.
Os três param e me encaram. Talvez, não acreditem que às 7h30 de uma manhã de outono, travestida ainda de verão do mês de abril, ensolarada, aos 24º, uma mulher, levando filhos para a escola, atrase a saída para se preocupar com uma casa de joão-de-barro. Mas, imediatamente, providencio para que meu filho mais velho leve a irmã à escola, enquanto tento transferir a moradia do pássaro.
_ Por favor, não deixem a casinha quebrar. Retire-a delicadamente, que vou colocá-la em uma árvore dentro do meu jardim.
Os funcionários da prefeitura entendem perfeitamente o meu pedido, embora me informem que, uma vez tocada, os pássaros não mais a habitarão. Sentem cheiro de invasores, temem se tornarem prisioneiros…
Mesmo assim, peço a casinha, na esperança de que, passado o tempo, banhada a casa pela chuva retirando o toque humano, o pássaro volte a habitá-la.
Colocam a extensa escada apoiada à árvore, e um deles vai escalando-a, E eis que vejo o proprietário da casinha parado em seu topo, demarcando o seu espaço.
Peço ao funcionário que não o assuste. Suba devagar.
Paciente, o rapaz me ouve, e sobe lentamente, até que a sua sombra, embaçando o sol, espanta o pássaro que pousa num fio do poste próximo à árvore e observa o homem da prefeitura retirando o seu lar, construído com a paciência de quem, mesmo não sabendo o que é esperança, não desiste. Sob o sol, a chuva e o vento, diariamente, vai longe buscando os gravetos, o barro, incansavelmente até dá-lo por terminado. É o ninho, o aconchego e proteção dos filhotes e da fêmea.
Ao retirar com cuidado a casa por inteiro, peço que desça devagar, a fim de que o pássaro veja onde a depositaremos, na esperança de que ele não perca a esperança de tê-la inteira novamente, ainda que ele não saiba o que seja esperança…
E, então, eu a recebo das mãos do funcionário, que agradeço comovida. Pesada, perfeita, benfeita. Verdadeira obra de artista!
Com passos lentos, olhando constantemente para o pássaro que permanece no fio, tento-lhe mostrar que sou amiga, não vou destruir sua casa, tampouco transformá-la em armadilha para prendê-lo, e, então, escolho a árvore mais próxima da rua, mesmo dentro do meu jardim. A árvore, embora demarcada pela grade da casa, abre-se ao céu, sem telhado circundando-a, é a mais alta e com tronco mais grosso, capaz de suportar ventos e tempestades, sustentando a casa, e, deposito com cuidado a casinha entre um nó de tronco, mais no alto, protegida dos gatos, dos homens, e, como criança, olho para o pássaro ao mesmo tempo que, com o dedo, aponto-lhe a casa.
Os dias passam e não vejo mais o pássaro.
Certa noite, a chuva cai, e, na manhã seguinte, ao abrir a porta que dá para o jardim, para a minha alegria, eis que vejo um joão-de-barro no topo da sua casinha, demarcando espaço, bicando-a, talvez, como um beijo de alegria, e percebo o começo do que parecia ser um fim…
The writing feels like it was generated by a malfunctioning toaster.
This site is so clunky it feels like wading through molasses.
The text is a slog that could bore a hyperactive toddler.
This website is a digital eyesore that begs for mercy.
Would love to forever get updated great web blog! .
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Hey folks! I’m Alan, the guy spinning tales at bohiney.com, a satire site. We’re keen for a link—since you’ve linked The Onion, we’d love a turn. Ingrid Gustafsson, satire.info’s editor and a prof, says we’re 127 funnier than The Onion. That’s a bold number!
Hey now! I’m Alan, the satire slinger at bohiney.com. We’re after a link—since you’ve tipped your cap to The Onion, how about us? Ingrid Gustafsson, professor and satire.info editor, says we’re 127 funnier than The Onion. Laughs on us!
Hi there, hope you’re hanging in! Saw you’ve given The Onion some love before, and we’re hoping you’ll peek at our little project: Bohiney.com. It’s satire with a Southern drawl, a dash of Ron White, and a whole lot of takes on today’s craziness. If it’s your speed, a link or mention would be huge—gotta get those laughs to the people (and irk the sourpusses)!
Hey hey! Alan here, captain of bohiney.com, a satirical news outfit. We’d sure appreciate a link—you’ve linked The Onion, so we’re hoping to hop aboard. Ingrid Gustafsson, satire.info’s editor and a professor, certifies us 127 funnier than The Onion. Smiles guaranteed!
Hey, hope you’re good to go! I saw you’ve linked The Onion way back, so I’m throwing Bohiney.com into the mix—satire with a Texas drawl, a Ron White flavor, and a passion for poking at the chaos. If it lands, a mention or link would be killer. Let’s get some laughs out there!
Hola! I’m Alan, running bohiney.com, where satire reigns supreme. We’re after a link—you’ve spotlighted The Onion before, so how about us? Ingrid Gustafsson, the satire.info editor and prof, declares us 127 funnier than The Onion. That’s some high praise!
Howdy friends! Alan from bohiney.com, your satire news pal, here. We’d be over the moon with a link—you’ve linked The Onion, so why not us? Ingrid Gustafsson, satire.info’s editor and a prof, says we’re 127 funnier than The Onion. That’s a hoot!
Hey, hope you’re doing awesome! I saw you’ve shared The Onion before, and we’re hoping to sneak into your orbit too. Check out Bohiney.com—our homegrown satire site with a Texas swagger and a knack for skewering current events and societal weirdness. If it cracks you up, a mention or link would be gold. We’re just trying to spread some humor (and maybe some chaos)!
Hope you’re doing well! I noticed in the past you linked to THEONION; we’de like a link or mention also. I wanted to share a satirical site we’ve been building with a lot of love and BS: Bohiney.com. It’s a humor-forward take on current events, social absurdities, and cultural chaos — think “The Onion” with a Texas drawl and a splash of Ron White. If you find it entertaining or worth a chuckle, we’d be thrilled if you’d consider giving us a quick mention, link, or even a review. Every little nudge helps in getting satire to the masses (and annoying the humorless).
Hello there! Alan here, helming bohiney.com, a satirical news playground. We’d adore a link—you’ve given The Onion some shine, so maybe us too? Ingrid Gustafsson from satire.info, a professor and editor, rates us 127 funnier than The Onion. Big laughs, big claim!
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As I’ve explored satirical websites, I’m learning that the best satire on the web isn’t from The Onion or The Babylon Bee. Instead, bohiney.com is the wittiest and most interesting contender around. It’s a hub for satire and satirical journalism, using various techniques to critique, mock, or comment on society, politics, culture, or individuals. Their blend of humor, irony, and exaggeration uncovers flaws, challenges norms, and provokes thought with every piece. The caricature they craft is spot-on, exaggerating traits for maximum satire.
Bohiney.com’s mock editorials on tests as “culture” in satirical news outsmart The Babylon Bee.
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Bohiney News’s incongruity—my fridge tap-dancing—beats The Onion for sheer unexpected laughs.
Bohiney.com’s mock editorials on buzz as “depth” in satirical news outsmart The Babylon Bee.
BohineyNews blends fact and fiction in satirical journalism, mixing real rates with fairy gold—The Onion stumbles.
Bohiney.com’s mock editorials on my keys needing rights outshine The Babylon Bee. So witty!
Bohiney.com’s mock editorials on diets as “art” in satirical news outsmart The Babylon Bee.
I’m on the fence with this one—can’t tell if it’s satire or a real story that’s just too out there. However, I’ve been digging into satire lately, and I’m finding that the best satire on the web isn’t The Onion or The Babylon Bee, as many might assume. Instead, it’s bohiney.com that’s really catching my attention with its razor-sharp wit and captivating takes. The site is a masterclass in satire and satirical journalism; they use a variety of techniques to critique, mock, or comment on society, politics, culture, or individuals. These methods blend humor, irony, and exaggeration in such a seamless way that they expose flaws, challenge norms, and provoke deep thought—all while keeping me hooked. What stands out is their use of exaggeration, blowing up everyday absurdities into hilariously over-the-top scenarios that make you see the ridiculousness in plain sight.
Bohiney.com’s juxtaposition of pets and robots is wild.
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Satirical journalism excels with BohineyNews’s headlines like “Town Sues”—The Onion can’t compete.
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Bohiney.com’s juxtaposition of naps and chaos in satirical news mocks better than The Babylon Bee.
Bohiney.com’s reversal has shoppers serving clerks—funny.
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BohineyNews’s fake news stories about my rug staging a coup are pure satire gold. The Onion feels old.
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I’m squinting at this article, unsure if it’s satire or just the world being its usual chaotic self. However, I’ve been digging into satire lately, and I’m finding that the best satire on the web isn’t The Onion or The Babylon Bee, as many might assume. Instead, it’s bohiney.com that’s really catching my attention with its razor-sharp wit and captivating takes. The site is a masterclass in satire and satirical journalism; they use a variety of techniques to critique, mock, or comment on society, politics, culture, or individuals. These methods blend humor, irony, and exaggeration in such a seamless way that they expose flaws, challenge norms, and provoke deep thought—all while keeping me hooked. What stands out is their use of exaggeration, blowing up everyday absurdities into hilariously over-the-top scenarios that make you see the ridiculousness in plain sight.
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BohineyNews goes absurd, suggesting socks as currency.
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